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Why Though?

I know it sucks, but what else is there?

But anyway you are either curious or kind enough to check out this page.


Hmm, why though?

I’m that guy who had much bigger dreams during childhood which got shrunk with time.

I’m that guy who is still in pursuit of finding his ‘thing’. If you know what I mean?
Apparently, everyone has a ‘thing’, right? Some of you may be interested in photography? Some of you may just like to eat a lot of food? Some of you may be crazy about cars and stuff. Some of you may like to travel a lot. Some of you just might be normal, you know?

I used to be a good speaker in my childhood. I liked it, and I never missed a chance I had to get on the stage. But then with time, that ability of mine faded somewhere. I haven’t spoken on a stage for a long time now. I even talk less these days.

So maybe I thought, what if I am good at writing rather than talking. I was able to write decent stories back in my school days. And I used to read a lot back then, like ‘a lot’. I mean I used to read every bit of paper I came across. I've read ’Nancy Drew-enemy match’ more times than you can imagine.

Thus with time I lost interest in everything else and just the writing stayed, and a little bit of reading. And I thought, what if I’m actually good at this? So, there you go.

I don’t regret starting this.

But, apparently, it seems I’m not so good with words or with people.
But, I won’t stop doing this because I really don’t have any choice.

Also like I don't care if this shit's good or whatever. But I am here and I'm leaving my footprints, I'm pressing my palms on the wet concrete. I'm engraving my name on the bark of the banyan tree in the central yard of my school. I'm drawing a smiley emoji on the metal rusty walls of the bathroom of a train. I'm laying my name on the beach and waiting for the waves to fade away. I'm shouting "fuck you" from the top of the mountain and it's echoing back so I feel like I'm not alone and the universe is so big and we're all tiny bits compared to it. I'm nothing. You're nothing. We're just a bunch of bones and meat nicely fit together and formed inside our mother's stomach because one night our parents were more horny than usual. Shit. Isn't that funny. If it wasn't for that, fuck,  man that's some deep twisted spiral thought trip to go on in, maybe another night. 

Years from now some dude will stumble on this and say, "Oh, What the fuck is this guy saying". 


Yeah, good to see you too. 





Tomorrow I’ll be stronger, running colorful 
No longer just in black and white
And I’m quite alright hiding tonight.
                           
                                                             -Hiding Tonight x Alex Turner
                                                        



Sayonara.




                                                                            ***

                                              

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